Hope you are doing well. I thought I may express some words with you
During the last years of my life I experienced a roller coaster of events that changed my life for ever, some of them good, but most of them bad. The last ones have to to do with extreme anxiety peaks, similar to epillepsy episodes, but with a different type of trigger in my mind, making me unable to walk, speak, or even stand up, causing vomiting, nausea and respiratory insufficiency (eventually making me faint), The impact of such events were so hard on me that they deteriorated my health to the point of being hevily medicated for indefinite time. However that doesnt mean that my symptoms dissappeared. they are just barely controlled. and this takes me to the point of this post.
Due to all previously mentioned, Ive been unable to make art again.
I tried several times to recover the rythm of production I used to have back when I started in 2012 but without success.
Every time I tried, my mind collapsed and all symptoms were there again to strike back again and again.
Being unable to recover such rythm I ended up loosing comunication with all my clients and had to abandon every project I was involved in. Which destroyed my reputation as a reliable artist and project partner, not to mention friends and co-workers.
Not having any other choice I abandoned the slightest possibility of making any form of art again and focused 100% on my full time job which is web development, so I am now working as a full time programer in a company.
I had to abandon my dream of working as an artist. It was hard, and it still is.
But I have not givven up.
Despite the odds you will still see me upload 1 or 2 works per year. Like a little flame that refuses to die from a storm.
I know its not much.
I know its dissapointing.
But its all I can do.
And for that I appologize and thank to all my old and new followers. I know you would have expected more from me, but these hard times are beating me up. Still my wonderfull girlfriend keeps up with me and supports me with so much love. It is one of the things that helps me move forward.
So again, thanks, and sorry.